Been thinking a lot about dying and living. Nothing morbid… just thinking on how to prepare for both.
No solutions yet.
Except for Jesus.
Work… so much work. And for what? To pay my bills so I can work?
I saw some blood the other day – where it should not have been… now I am tired and thinking of dying again.
I lay down in the middle of the day all proud of myself because I was going to rest.
Five minutes later all I could think of is what was NOT done…. So I changed my mind and didn’t rest.
I opened up my email and was doing a search for something related to work and what popped up quite by "coincidence" was a long-ago email from my sister entitled, “I Hear His Whisper..."You must learn to rest."
Among other things, it said:
“I’m not telling you to lie down and give up. I’m telling you that you must be okay with stillness in the middle of a battle. You must listen when I encourage you to rest. You must trust me enough to release yourself to rest, to give yourself permission to stop thinking, to find refreshment in my presence, so you can receive a new strategy that looks totally different than what you expected. I want to teach you what you cannot teach yourself. You know when to push, to declare, to fight, and to dance over pain, but you must also learn to rest.”
No, I am not kidding. It was that blatant and in my face. It made me cry a little. I would have cried more but I needed to wait until I finished my work. No, I am not kidding about that either.
I have to laugh…cry at how patient God is with me.
I am ready to change my thinking… or maybe let God change my thinking.
I’m willing… I just don’t know how. I need me some Jesus strategy...
