HOLDING THE COATS

My heart may be happy, but there are many who do not have any reference to happiness in their lives. Sometimes it is from choice, but sometimes it is from choices foisted upon them by others.

Take Linda, for instance. I attended Dilworth Junior High School in Sparks, Nevada. All of 7th and 8th grade Linda was tormented by others. I guess today, it would be called bullying.

Each recess time, groups would circle around Linda and call her horrible names, throw rocks and anything they could find and keep her captive within that circle of jeering pubescent teenagers.

Did I participate? Well, the people of the Sanhedrin "laid their coats at the feet of a young man named Saul," and he stood by and watched.

By not participating, I participated.

I would never have shouted or thrown anything...my mother taught me better than that. But she forgot to teach me what it meant to watch someone suffer and do nothing.

For many years it haunted me. I prayed that I would find her and two others who suffered like her. I took full responsibility for it. Of course, I probably could not have stopped the kids from destroying her day by day, but I may have given her a glimmer of hope that someone cared...but I didn't, so I knew that I was as responsible as any one of the others.

I told the Lord that if I ever found any of them that I would apologize and ask forgiveness.

Through the wonders of facebook, one day I did find Linda. I knew that this was my chance to show her some love and perhaps get the forgiveness I needed. So I exchanged a short series of messages with her. And I quote:

Me:

Are you the Linda that used to go to Dilworth Junior High School? I have been looking for someone with this name for awhile. If you are the one that was tall and thin and attended that school, please email me. I have an apology to make.

Linda

Yes How did you know? that was a real long time ago.

Me:

I have never forgotten you and here is why. I remember kids making fun of you and I wasn't really sure why. You were real spunky and fought back. I admired you for that.
Anyway, I was not one of those that said mean things, but I stood by and let it happen without standing up for you. It has weighed on me all of these years and I promised myself and God that if I ever found you, I would ask your forgiveness for not saying anything and letting those stupid and cruel kids do and say what they did.
I always wondered where and how you ended up because of the trauma of junior high.
So, now is my chance to ask your forgiveness for allowing this to happen. Will you forgive me?
I know you probably don't even remember me - and that's okay, I just want to let you know that someone did care - just too late.
Thanks for responding to me. I really appreciate it.

Linda

Yes I do forgive you. I really appreicate you coming forward to me at this time. It took alot for you to find me. But im glad you did. I hope we can talk again Id really like to know what you are doing now adays. Im working as an assistant manager of a convience store, and I do preservation work on the side. My email address is (deleted for privacy). I have a dog named squeaker and 2 cats one is named spats and the other is named misty. I live in Summerfield, Florida I do karaoke, along with my busy schedule. I feel you were real sincere to me. I appreciate you very much. Its nice to know that you care about me after all of these years.

And just like that, I was forgiven! No penalties given and because of her sweet forgiveness, my guilt was gone...

What a lesson we could all learn from her open heart and quickness to forgive what had to be a very painful time in her life.